Thursday, May 10, 2007

More Electricity...

I really like cardiac stories. I really like cardiac patients. I REALLY like cardiac interventions, especially defibrillation/cardioversion. I might run out of LIFEPAK stories, but probably not.

We had a cardiologist that was a really good doctor. He knew everything, always came to the ER in the middle of the night, and saved many a life through his expertise and knowledge, I'm sure. He also had no idea how to treat the nurses like humans, not dog-slaves, and had the absolute worst bedside manner I've ever seen. He didn't smile, used big medical-sounding words, (which is a huge no-no if you want the gene-pool floaters we see to understand ANYTHING you say), and didn't ever hold question-and-answer time. We all hated him.

One night we were treating a patient, we'll call him Mr. Jones, in A-Fib with RVR. It was new onset within the last hour or so. Nothing was really working, and he wasn't compensating very well. Mean Cardiologist just happened to be in the building for some reason, so he zoomed down to help us out.

Turns out that Mrs. Jones had been seen by Mean Cardiologist before, and Mr. Jones didn't much like him. Go figure. Mr. Jones started yelling at Mean Cardiologist as soon as he came in the door. (which DID help his BP to go up a little. For a minute.) Of course Mean Cardiologist had no idea who Mr. Jones was, because Mrs. Jones had been his patient, and she wasn't in the room.

Mean Cardiologist talked to the ED doc for a second, then went over to tell Mr. Jones, "I'm sorry you don't like me. We're going to fix your heart so you're still alive to not like me tomorrow."

Anyway, long story short, we got Mr. Jones ready for cardioversion, and Mean Cardiologist stood beside the bed while we shocked...... And when Mr. Jones did the Electricity Shuffle on the gurney, his flailing arm hit Mean Cardiologist right in the nuts.

Thank God he converted. Because Mean Cardiologist was a bit miffed, and not feeling very helpful anymore. Mrs. Jones passed him in the hall a minute later on her way in and said to the ED doc, "Was Mean Cardiologist in here? Mr. Jones wasn't rude to him, was he? He really doesn't like him. Why was he walking funny?"

She didn't understand the hysterical laughter. I wonder if her husband will remember......


John McElveen said...

LMAO! Great Story,


Catherine said...

BAHAHA! Fabulous, absolutely fabulous.

ERnursey said...

It must have been hard to take care of the patient while you were all rolling around on the floor.

MonkeyGirl said...

Nope, I have my hysteria standing up. I've seen what is on these floors. I wish I didn't have to WALK on them sometimes!