Friday, May 11, 2007

Dental work

I have the night off, and my circadian rhythm is always screwed up, so I'm up all night watching shows I've Tivo'd.

I'm watching the last "Criminal Minds" episode, and there's this crack whore that the serial killer they're trying to catch is tormenting. She's locked in a big, huge slaughterhouse, and he's doing the "Saw" thing. (Well, at least it's what I think the "Saw" thing is. I was too chicken to watch "Saw".)

Anyway, all the way through the episode, she's running into walls and falling down stairs, etc, etc, and I'm looking at her and her face is all bloody and I'm thinking, "What's wrong with this picture?" (well, besides the fact that she's going to get killed by a psychopath).

And it dawned on me.... She has PERFECT TEETH. Not just a little perfect, I'm talking GORGEOUS perfect. Straight, whitened, the whole nine yards. What crack whore has perfect teeth? Around here, you don't even have to be a crack whore to have horrible teeth. If we didn't have the locals with the little brown nubbins coming in for narcotics and antibiotics (and then trying to fill the narcs without filling the abx), I don't think my night would be complete!

So somebody tell Hollyweird that if they're going to cast someone as a crack whore, please do something with her teeth. If they need an example of actual druggie teeth, give me a call. Shouldn't take more than about ten minutes for one to come in.

6 comments:

John McElveen said...

LMAO!

Can u say- Fill all or None??? LOL

John

I have to finish watching that episode- I'm right at the start where she fell through the door and is pulling the glass out of her cheeck! I hate it when that happens!!

Someday...Nurse said...

I noticed that, too. I thought she (the actress) must be dating the producer.

ERnursey said...

that cracked me up too, maybe they should've shopped at the faces of meth page.

Anonymous said...

Loving this. I'm an OMFS who works at a major trauma center. You got this SOOOO right. PS they don't need narcs. The tooth didn't turn black overnight, they freaking save them up so they can go impress the ER with how "bad" it looks and get more narcs.

Anonymous said...

No Kidding! Last week my teen and I were doing the treadmill thing at the fit club and there was this soap on the tube. The lovely blonde was 'confessing' to her simularly lovely mother that she had been "a crystal meth addict for over a year" as tears rolled down her perfect skin from her bagless eyes, past her perfect lipstick and lovely straight white teeth..... we had quite a laugh at that

TC said...

Ha! Love the use of the word nubbins, BTW