Thursday, January 10, 2008

Things that suck, and one thing that doesn't

Have you ever had one of those days where you just want to curl up in the fetal position in the middle of your bed with the covers over your head until the world just goes away?

Well, I'm having one of those weeks.

Apparently my manic side is on vacation.

In the middle of this darkness, I have received numerous supportive emails. They contained uplifting articles for me to read in order to cheer me up.

Stories of a guy who cooked and ate his girlfriend, a guy who threw his kids off a bridge, the Phucker Phred Phelps in action again, a fatal (x4) case of falling through the cracks, and of course, the usual 'serial killer cuts short a vivacious young girl's life' story.

Needless to say, I'm not very cheered up.

So, I propose that we come up with suitable punishments for the above perpetrators of evil. For instance, we've decided that the guy who threw his kids off the bridge should have his genitalia removed with a nail file, and then force-fed to him as he is staked to a hill of fire ants. For starters.

Perhaps some fictitious retribution will cheer me up.

Because this is what happens when I try to spend all day in bed.


MonkeySister said...

Cyber hug, Sweetie!

You can come and listen to the little monkey's running around here... It's a little less depressing than reading the internet... but not much... :)

or you can just call me and get it first hand but still at a distance... :)

wordwitch said...

Hello Monekygirl. I feel some of your pain....but am stuck in bed not because there is a massive dark cloud eclipsing the world, but because my dog broke my leg. Yup, 70 lbs of boxer slamming into one's knee at an angle causes a "rt tibial plateau fracture." Which really sucks, for many reasons I won't go into here on comments. Add to the "no bearing weight for 8-10 weeks" challenge the fact that I live in a 2-story house with the only working bathroom on the second level....luckily, we don't have cats.

fan 'o yours said...

I vote for near drowning over, and over, and over again for several years for the B@st&rd that threw those kids off the bridge. Drowning is an effing awful way to die.
Been there w/ the depressed thing, nothing I've found works like just some time - and chocolate. Get a flyswatter to help with the cat thing.

Mom In Scrubs said...

I think anyone who commits a heinous crime should die the way their victims die, only slower.

Did you read about the guy who poured hot oil over his girlfriend's 17-month old, shook him so hard he broke his spine, then took a hairdryer and burned his skin off? What a POS!!! Someone should shove a hairdryer up his ass and turn it on full blast until he fries from the inside out. And film it so that the 17month old can watch it later when/if he grows up.

Sorry to contribute to your melancholy. I think coming up with creative ways to punish bad guys should help cheer you up. And go to your sister's house. A hug from a child is the best medicine!

emergencyem said...

Go read my newest blog should make you laugh at other people's stupidity!

mielikki said...

cheese grater. To the back of the thighs. Add salt liberally

911DOC said...

ok. that's a freaking genius video. HAH!

Nurse K said...

Here's a cheery link for you from the Where the Hell do you Find This Stuff? files.

It has: Kittens singing, aliens, and tinfoil hats.

Joeymom said...

My cat does that. But then, so do my kids.

Want some good news? I love Good News Network.,6_1_NA25_TRUCK_S1.article