There is a serious underestimation of the importance of poo.
Lack of poo production can make you cranky. It can make you tired. It can make you sick. But cranky, sick, and tired are one thing. What about dead?
If you're schizophrenic, and you take clozapine, your bowels can become so impacted that you vomit your own poo, aspirate it, develop pulmonary edema, and die.
What if you're smuggling drugs? Once you swallow that balloon, you have set in motion a cycle that is beyond your control. The only way you can make any money off those drugs is if you can take a poo. These guys learned that lesson the hard way.
Edith Rodriguez took too much Vicodin and did too much meth, and she died. From the official Coroner's Report:
"This 43-year-old Hispanic woman died as a result of consequences of a perforated focal colonic diverticulitis. Autopsy findings show a megacolon/pseudo-obstruction associated with the effects of recent prescription medication intake. Methamphetamine use was also a contributory factor to her final demise."No poo=death.
There are steps that you can take to prevent your unnecessary death. You can spend $175 for a three month program that will make you feel better and give you something to do with your digital camera.
Or you can go to PoopStrong.org and get a simple wristband that shows how important it is to Poop Strong. I can't guarantee that it will actually make you poop strong, but I've had my bracelet for about a week now, and let me tell you, I've never pooped better.
And with the holidays coming, we all need a little regulation, am I right?
Go get one today. The life you save just might be your own. Besides, it's for the children.
No, this is not my website. I'm not that much of an entrepreneur. I really do have a bracelet, though. It's funny, it's irreverent, and I like it. You do too. You know you do.