Thursday, June 14, 2007

My head almost exploded last night.

It all started when I went to Generic Nurse K's blog and read this post about false dichotomies. Of course, then I had to go read the post she was going nuts over.

Now, I don't read the Universal Health Blog. The uncomplicated reason is that it's got too many columns and links and clutter and it hurts my ADHD brain. It's just not visually appealing. I don't want to have to work so hard to be entertained/informed, etc. The other reason is that this N=1 person bores me. If I don't either laugh at what you write or agree with what you write, I don't waste my time with you. I would expect the same of anyone visiting my blog.


You have to break up the eloquent verbosity with some strategically placed spaces.

Like so.

Otherwise my brain goes into "scan" mode, and I skip 3/4 of what you have to say. I'm just sayin'. (That's why girlvet intimidates me. She can make me read an entire page with no spaces, and I read the whole thing. How does she DO that?)

Anyhoo. While I was on the previously-mentioned rant-inducing site, I figured that I would look through a few posts, you know, just in case I had made an error *gasp* in judgement. (Hey, I've been wrong before. Once, I think.) And I came upon this post about nurses and doctors and why can't we all just get along. Which led to posts by Signout, another by N=1, and one by Midwife With a Knife.

After at least an hour of painful reading (because I was determined to stick it out to the very freakin' end), I came to my own conclusion.

This person with the pseudonym N=1 is, as Scalpel puts it, C-R-A-Y-Z-E-E. And not just regular crazy. Angry crazy. And not just angry crazy. Angry crazy with a huge sense of entitlement.

When I read a physician blog, I read it as just that. A physician blogging. When I read a med student blog, I read it as just that. A med student. Someone who is going to be a physician.

You know, a physician. That guy (or gal), who went to 7-10 freakin' years of medical school. Compare that to 2 years for an ADN. Or 3 if you've got a BSN. Last time I checked, 2 did not equal 10. All of the associated monetary costs of school and subsequent pay after school are not equal. The decision-making requirements and responsibility for those decisions are not equal.

Therefore. Nurses. and. Physicians. Are. Not. Equals.

The people may be equals. An MD isn't any more important as a person than the guy working behind the counter at McDonalds. But nobody ever died because they didn't get a hamburger. And McDonalds workers don't need malpractice insurance. (Though they should. Yuck!)

So if I read a physician's blog and they put the nurses in their own section in the blogroll, I think, "Hey, they've got nurses on their blogroll. Cool!" Not, "Hey, why are the nurses segregated on the blogroll? Bastard!"

If I read a physician's blog and they say nice things about what a nurse has done, I think,"Hey, they noticed how hard we work. Cool!" Not, "Hey what about how smart I am? Bastard!"

If I read a med student's blog and they don't *gasp* mention the nurses in every post, I think, "Damn. Sucks to be them. They work hard. Glad I decided not to go to medical school." Not, "Why aren't they talking about me? Bastard!"

And if I don't like what someone has to say on their very own blog that they started, write, and maintain, I just don't read it. I don't attack them in the comments, and I sure the hell don't come back and make a huge pain in the ass of myself. It's their damn blog!

So I was already wanting to beat this N=1 person about the head with a crowbar, when I clicked on the "About" tab and read this.

"I continue to hold nursing licensure in one state, but I no longer practice clinically, no longer teach, and no longer work as an employee within the healthcare industry. As one who never found a niche in the system, I find blogging to be a platform for free-er thinking - and for the risks and advantages that the forum provides."

Translation: I sucked as a nurse, and I'm no longer a nurse, but I'm going to continue to call myself a nurse and throw Molotov Cocktails at people from behind my cloak of anonymity.

That's even lower than a politician. At least they're not anonymous.

Jeez. Go away, you freak.

PS: N=1, if you grace us with your presence, you only get one comment. I'll delete any more than that. I will not allow you to take over my comments section with your diatribes.

Thank you, that is all.


Nurse K said...

Dude. Yeah, it's boring most of the time, but the degree of crayzee is interesting as a study in borderline personality disorder if nothing else. Black or white. Us or them. The faux-victim mentality is something that also rattles my chains, and she wears 'Victim' across her chest proudly in nearly every post. I think I caught fibromyalgia just from reading too much on there.

Check this one out from today about preparation for a response to a flu pandemic and the nurse's role:

No one else will carry this burden, will experience its horrors, and will sacrifice to the extent that nurses will. No other healthcare professional is committed to being with patients throughout their illness and death.

Look. I can't give anyone treatment without a doctors' order. It's not just ME or US, K? Monkeygirl and I will be running around with our respirators on helping people, but so will doctors, aids, RTs, and everyone else. It's what we ALL signed up for.

I'll bet N=1 is the person at work who argues with everyone, complains behind peoples' backs about trivial things and, when she signs up for the latest social event posted on the bulletin board, people question whether they should sign up too.

Constance said...

Ooooh, you go Monkeygirl ! Say it like it is !

I don't think with the facts you've laid out here, N=1 is going to take you on.

Entitlement and self-absorbtion can be very boring...

mielikki said...

I'm with you on this one, Monkey Girl. No one could have put it better

Jess said...

Finally. Someone who can write properly and interestingly said it right.

Well done.

She makes me ashamed sometimes with her rants and anger and I hope people know she isn't speaking for all of us.

I can only imagine the thoughts stewing in her head right now over your post.

Keep up the good work.

Nurse K said...

I wonder what this is about, hm?

Anyone want to be one of my thugz?

Barbara said...

N=1's own comment on one of her own posts that you mentioned, the one where she's calling for a nurse/doc tandem blog:

There are very few nurses who will question and engage physicians in this kind of conversation. For the most part, nurses express their feelings of oppression and humiliation with passive aggressive reactions.

I hope you'll forgive me for what I'm about to say about that...

What the fuck is that all about? What kind of whiny-assed piece-of-shit calls herself a Nurse and can't stand up for herself without being "passive-aggressive" about their "oppression" and how dare she suggest that everyone else is just as fucked up as she is? Not only is this so obviously out in left field, it's not even in the same ballpark as any of the REAL NURSES I've had the pleasure of working with over the course of my career would play in. Granted we can all be a little arrogant and self-righteous sometimes - goes with the territory of being human but this nonsense? Ohhhh no, no,'s on now...

Monkeygirl, today I bow down to your majesty. Great call. Great post. Nurse K, you're awesome yourself. I'll be linking all this up myself a little later on tonight when I finish up some work I need to get done....

scalpel said...

The curtain has been officially pulled back.

I bet a pizza that she's not really gone by the weekend.

911DOC said...

RIGHT FUCKING ON BE-ATCH! (i mean that with all affection).

911DOC said...

isn't it sad that i have to qualify a statement like that? as much as i hate to admit it, the PC nazis have caused me to alter my form of expression. BE-ATCH! hope i get to work with you someday.

Nurse K said...

I think you should immediately ban 911Doc from your blog. He obviously views nurses as "bizatches", or inferior to himself, the big 'ol doctor on the big 'ol pedestal being paid record salary by corporate America...the same corporate greedmongers who charge poor women living in homeless shelters tons of dough just for the chance of being in his presence.

Ban 911Doc now [even though his avatar is totally da bomb!] Either ban 911Doc or all we've worked for in nursing goes down the toilet bowl and we're nothing more than the doctors' personal bizatches again.

Which'll it be? 911Doc or professional nursing practice?

911DOC said...

Ban me? I've only been banned from casinos and stip clubs in the past. Banned from a blog? Monkey Girl please NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Nurse K said...

Who are you with, Monkeygirl, us (the nurses, the ones who do everything around this joint) or them (those self-described cantankerous physicians who do nothing other than defame nurses at every opportunity)?

The choice is yours, but if you choose to allow this deviant to stay, I'll have to call you out as a HIPAA-violator in retaliation. Furthermore, being banned from a strip club is further evidence of his image of women. What are we, just tits and ass to you, 911doc?

No. I will not be called tits and ass by a physician. I'm not here for your viewing pleasure. I'm here to do everything. Hear that? Everything.

Vitriolic Virchow said...

I've heard of a head nurse, but never a head-case nurse. Learn sump'n new eber day.

William the Coroner.

Vitriolic Virchow said...

Everything, says nurse K, everything? Bwahahahahahahahaha.

Oh, did I write that out loud?

William the Coroner

scalpel said...


Nurse K said...


MonkeyGirl said...

I can't ban 911DOC. He's already threatened to kill me once.

I'm just T&A, though. I won't do everything.

K, you kill me. You really kill me.

The Platypus said...

Can't we all just get along?

Nurse K said...

I'm just T&A, though. I won't do everything.

This situation is worse than I thought. This so-called doctor has deluded a professsional nurse into thinking she's nothing more than T&A.

I think I have no other choice than to ban you from your own blog, Monkeygirl, for allowing these comments to be posted and feeding into the anti-nurse sentiments. You're a disgrace as well.

Platypus: no, I can't just get along. I feel *we* have been used for far too long and it's time for it to end. I've noticed on your blog that you have not yet addressed 911Doc's comments and publically defended nursing. You also haven't talked about any of my pet topics today. You are, thus, also unprofessional and pale in comparison to me and my superiority. I've also noted numerous copyright and HIPAA violations and you'll be reported to the proper authorities for each as well.

The Platypus said...

Are you going to continue rubbing it in that I spelled it HIPPA once? I got a friggin' BSN in fifteen months. I'd like to see an MD do that.

scalpel said...

Would one of you get me some coffee?

MonkeyGirl said...

Cream? Sugar? Can I rub your feet, sir? Hold on, and I'll peel you some grapes.....

PS: Why is it always about what I can do for you? How come you never tell me how smart I am? Bastard! ;-)

GuitarGirlRN said...

I just gotta say...


I could go on for hours about how I agree with every word etc etc but I won't.

I dig you peeps.

That is all.

Medblog Addict said...

Heh--this is fun--y'all fight dirty. It's nice to see y'all turning on each other for a change and giving the lawyers a break.

Love your blog MonkeyGirl.

Matt G said...

Superb reality check, MonkeyGirl.

TwinsX2 said...

Hey, why are people assuming that N-1 is a WOMAN. Men are nurses too.

kathie said...

y'all are FUNNY!