I think my cats have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome

I'm really worried about them. They seem to be sleeping a lot.

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So I looked up the symptoms of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, and I'm pretty sure that's what's wrong. After all, the Internet says so. And everybody knows the Internet is always right!

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This is what I found on The Chronic Fatigue Syndrome of America website (who by the way, boast 20 years of making CFS History):

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Symptoms:

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Weakness and exhaustion, lasting more than 24 hours, following mental or physical activity

All they do is sleep. I find them at the top of the stairs, sleeping, as if just climbing the stairs has exhausted them so much that they have to nap. After we play "Chase the Laser Light" for a few minutes, they always have to lay down (though I'm not sure if it's the mental or physical activity that does them in).

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Unrefreshing sleep

They must be getting unrefreshing sleep. They sleep 23 hours a day. How refreshing can it be if it takes 23 hours to do it?

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Substantial impairment of short-term memory or concentration

I feed them, and then 5 minutes later they're begging for food again. As if they've totally forgotten I already fed them. When the 5-year-old chases them, they run for a little bit, but then they let her catch them. As if they've forgotten why they're running.

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Muscle pain, or pain in the joints, without swelling or redness

Sometimes they move really slow, and they always grunt in pain whenever they jump down off the countertop or the bed. I ask them if they're hurting, but they never answer. Perhaps they've forgotten.

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Headaches of a new type, pattern or severity

Sometimes, when they're sleeping, they bury their heads under their paws, as if the very light is hurting them. Sometimes they sleep under the bed in the darkened room, away from any noise that might hurt their tender kitty heads.

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Tender armpit and/or neck lymph nodes

When the 5-year-old carries them around with her arm under their armpits, and their feet dangling toward the ground, they always struggle to get away. I think it's because their little armpit lymph nodes are sore.

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Sore throat

Sometimes, when they've meowed a lot, they sound a little hoarse. Like they have little kitty sore throats.

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It's really hard to tell, since there are no actual signs of this disease, only symptoms. Hmmm, that sounds like another disease I've heard of.... Oh My God, what if they have fibromyalgia, too? Pain, Fatigue, Sleep Problems, Impaired Memory and Concentration, Headaches, Restless Leg Syndrome (their little paws are always twitching when they're trying to sleep)......

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Help! Does anyone know a Fibromyalgia/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome vet? I need to get them hooked up with a PMD, or else they'll start showing up in my ER on the ambulance, looking for narcotics! Do you have any idea how embarrassing that would be?