Monday, June 25, 2007

I think my cats have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome


I'm really worried about them. They seem to be sleeping a lot.
.
So I looked up the symptoms of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, and I'm pretty sure that's what's wrong. After all, the Internet says so. And everybody knows the Internet is always right!
.
This is what I found on The Chronic Fatigue Syndrome of America website (who by the way, boast 20 years of making CFS History):
********************
Symptoms:
.
Weakness and exhaustion, lasting more than 24 hours, following mental or physical activity
All they do is sleep. I find them at the top of the stairs, sleeping, as if just climbing the stairs has exhausted them so much that they have to nap. After we play "Chase the Laser Light" for a few minutes, they always have to lay down (though I'm not sure if it's the mental or physical activity that does them in).
.
Unrefreshing sleep
They must be getting unrefreshing sleep. They sleep 23 hours a day. How refreshing can it be if it takes 23 hours to do it?
.
Substantial impairment of short-term memory or concentration
I feed them, and then 5 minutes later they're begging for food again. As if they've totally forgotten I already fed them. When the 5-year-old chases them, they run for a little bit, but then they let her catch them. As if they've forgotten why they're running.
.
Muscle pain, or pain in the joints, without swelling or redness
Sometimes they move really slow, and they always grunt in pain whenever they jump down off the countertop or the bed. I ask them if they're hurting, but they never answer. Perhaps they've forgotten.
.
Headaches of a new type, pattern or severity
Sometimes, when they're sleeping, they bury their heads under their paws, as if the very light is hurting them. Sometimes they sleep under the bed in the darkened room, away from any noise that might hurt their tender kitty heads.
.
Tender armpit and/or neck lymph nodes
When the 5-year-old carries them around with her arm under their armpits, and their feet dangling toward the ground, they always struggle to get away. I think it's because their little armpit lymph nodes are sore.
.
Sore throat
Sometimes, when they've meowed a lot, they sound a little hoarse. Like they have little kitty sore throats.
********************
.
It's really hard to tell, since there are no actual signs of this disease, only symptoms. Hmmm, that sounds like another disease I've heard of.... Oh My God, what if they have fibromyalgia, too? Pain, Fatigue, Sleep Problems, Impaired Memory and Concentration, Headaches, Restless Leg Syndrome (their little paws are always twitching when they're trying to sleep)......
.
Help! Does anyone know a Fibromyalgia/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome vet? I need to get them hooked up with a PMD, or else they'll start showing up in my ER on the ambulance, looking for narcotics! Do you have any idea how embarrassing that would be?

26 comments:

Joeymom said...

Holy crap. I think I have every single one of those symptoms! I should go to the ER and complain to the nurses there!

No, wait a minute. I'm just a mom of two kids. Nevermind.

;)

William the Coroner said...

I had chronic fatigue syndrome for eight years. It was called medical school and residency.

William the Coroner said...

It was also accompanied by a very bad case of lakanookie, but I was too tired to care.

RealisticRN said...

MG,
You are just not right...

So, joke time...What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?

RealisticRN said...

I was going to leave you hanging (no pun intended...)but I've got to go to bed...

She said, "If we don't get some support, people are going to think we're nuts!"

MonkeyGirl said...

Ha-ha-ha-ha! *snort*

(And you say I'm not right!)

Loving Annie said...

Ha-ha-ha !!!! Kitties of the world unite ! Someone has figured us out !!!
I'm gonna open that vet practice RIGHT AWAY.
I bet there are some rich people who will bring their pets in after this article is published in the latest issue of Town and Country....

Happy Monday to you, Monkeygirl !

CrankyProf said...

Those are some very attractive throw rugs you've acquired...

Have you had them checked for narcolepsy? It's endemic in our feline population...of course, so is Tourettes, based on the yowling.

Ambulance Driver said...

The ER won't be able to cure them. No one will. What you need is a Cat Whisperer. ;)

DamnLemming said...

They appear to be rather large; perhaps if they lost some weight, some of their Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/Fibromyalgia symptoms would go away. :)

The Platypus said...

There's nothing wrong with those cats that a meth habit couldn't fix.

RevMedic said...

Mebbe they have obstructive sleep apnea, and need CPAP. That'd be a picture I'd like to see!

Amy said...

Joeymom stole my comment!

Actually, I'm just the mother of one toddler, but I'm also overweight and like to stay up late watching TV (midnight is the only time I can get any peace and quiet!). Fortunately for ER staff everywhere, I have a strong sense of personal responsibility and no tolerance for narcotics. And my crazy is well-controlled by the Prozac...

Someday...Nurse said...

"DamnLemming said...

They appear to be rather large; perhaps if they lost some weight, some of their Chronic Fatigue Syndrome/Fibromyalgia symptoms would go away. :)"

Lemming! How dare you insult Monkey's poor cats! Don't you know that it is not their fault they are overweight? They obviously have a glandular problem. I bet they hardly eat a thing.

~Raven

#1 Dinosaur said...

I think you hit the diagnosis on the head!

As for treatment: try acupuncture.

daedalus2u said...

Chronic fatigue syndrome is a real syndrome, caused by not enough mitochondria in the skeletal muscles. They are enough for basal metabolism, but not much more. The slightest effort beyond being "at rest" consumes the stored phosphocreatine and the muscle goes into ATP deficit. If you push too hard, the muscle gets damaged.

It is analogous to deconditioning, but to a pathological level.

girlvet said...

I think your cats are depressed. They need a cat therapist, perhaps a little prozac....

mielikki said...

my cats suffer the same disease, maybe its a feline epidemic? Either that, or they were throw rugs in their previous life

scalpel said...

Too funny!

I'm thinking a Kittygesic patch would be out:

1) You'd have to shave a little spot on their tummy so it would stick.

2) They would lick it and bite it until it came off.

3) You'd have to call the doctor and tell him that they lost the patch.

4) He'd think you were a drug seeker and cut you off.

Maybe some Meowphine elixir might work better.

John McElveen said...

Awesome Cats!!!!

Cats show up at Urgent Scare all the time seeking Catnip for it (Chronic Fatigue)--they are always allergic to Milk, almost all Cat Traeats and Tuna. The only thing that will keep me awake is Cat--- Catn---you know the Nip Drug....

What's your fatigue on a scale of 1 to 10 if One is wide awake and 10 is the .slee: MEOW!!!!!! MEOW!!---Wow that sleepy huh? Huh?? Nudge , Nudge-- wake up- Kitty sternal rub- gets them roused...

:-)

J

Happy Vegemite said...

Sounds to me like your cats definitely have something wrong with them. Wait,no all cats act like that, don't they? Maybe CFS is actually a cat disease that has crossed the species barrier into humans!

If CFS was a lack of enough mitochondria in muscles, wouldn't it show up in a muscle biopsy?

Rocky Mountain Medic said...

you are frickin' hilarious!

ID Crossroads said...

Hehe... Nice post. I'm actually shocked that you didn't get any angry comments from supposed CFS and fibromyalgia sufferers! :)

Rocky Mountain Medic said...

I had to read it again. And it was still frickin' hillarious.

911DOC said...

thanks to daedulus2u for explaining a heretofore unexplainable and untestable syndrome. researchers, stop your engines and get some sleep, you must be fatigued on the mitochondrial level.

The Therapist said...

Been lurking, but this post was so funny, I had to come out to say so!